Her life can never be about constantly thinking of what people did to her otherwise they would receive glory or feel condemned. 
Her life can never be about holding a grudge or it will bring her sickness. 
Her life can never be about self pity or she will never experience true joy. 
Her life can never be about proving her worth or she’ll never truly find her identity. 
Her life can never be about resentment or she will never truly be free. 
Her life can never be about vengeance or she’ll be a bitter person. 
Her life can never be about hatred or she’ll never fall in love. 
Her life can never be about needing acceptance or she will always be a restavèk. 
Her life can never be about feeling like the world owes her something or she will make someone else her restavèk.